Love, lust, connections, and the waves.

I had just paddled my way to the flat bit of the sea; several turtle rolls later and with the white water essentially slapping my face ridiculous number of times. I was tired. Paddling is tough. Being hit by the waves was hard. Getting dragged by the water with a leash around your ankle tied to your soft board all the whilst trying to protect your head is not easy, but the moment you catch that wave and ride it all the way to the shore is a feeling I cannot describe. A feeling I hadn’t felt in a long, long time.

I have always been a water baby. I find therapy in the sea. Growing up, I had imagined I’d be the girl with the wild hair and sun kissed skin. Heck, The Girl From Ipanema is one of my favourite songs. So, yes, every once in a while, I have to take myself to that place that fuels me with joy and energy and reminds me of who I always wanted to be and who I am becoming. 

Sri Lanka offered me a bit of that and so much more. 

Lust v/s Love 

I believe there are only two types of men you meet when it comes to romantic connections. (This holds true for me at least.)

There are the ones you see and you want to do nothing more that rip their shirt off and do naughty things. And then there are the ones you want to get to know a bit more because something about their soul speaks to your soul. 

I have mostly experienced only the former. In fact, I don’t think I have every experienced the latter. At all. I know, bold statement. But it’s true. I have met a lot of beautiful men in my life and a lot of those liaisons have started because I have been instantly attracted to them. So, yes, looking at someone and not thinking of them in a sexual way first is new to me. 

But when I looked at the surfer photographer, I felt the latter. 

He was exactly my type. He had a travellers tan. He’d lived in so many different countries. He cared about the environment and politics and human rights. He was a surfer. He took photos of people and places. He was kind and humble and didn’t let his beauty cloud him.He had the most beautiful smile and playful eyes and long surfer hair and tattoos and a nose piercing. He was essentially everything I’d picture the guy of my dreams would be. But not a single sexual thought crossed my mind. 

All I was interested in was getting to know him, his views on society, his future plans and his travel stories. 

We had our moments. Like the time he held my face to see how bad the bruise was from when the surf board smacked my lips or the time when the camera was passed around the table for people to take candid photos of everyone but he just kept taking photos of me, or when we walked on the beach during the beach clean and he talked about his travel plans, or that longer than 30-second hug goodbye on my last day. There were far too many sweet moments that’ll make me smile. And I was happy with things just that way. 

It’s the strangest feeling coming across someone who is just simply a beautiful soul. All you want to do is capture that image of them in your mind and store it for you to carry with you everywhere you go. 

I will probably never see the hot surfer photographer again. But meeting him reminded me of the values I should be looking for when I do meet my hot surfer photographer in the future. 

It taught me to recognise that big distinction between love and lust. 

So, yes, Sri Lanka has been special. I have learnt to appreciate connections and realise that sometimes the memory of moments is sweeter and fonder than a story we want to last a lifetime. 

But most importantly, I learnt that when I paddled my way to the still part of the sea and when my surf teacher asked me if I wanted to catch the next green wave, regardless, of how tired I was from the paddling and the knock backs, I said, “Let’s do it” 

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