The guy I went on a few great dates with has decided to end things in the most brutal way possible - going cold turkey.
In my head, I am trying to work out why that hurts. Yes, getting rejected isn't very nice, but I'm grown up enough to realise that I am not going to be everybody's cup of tea, and that's okay.
But at the heart of the hurt is the manner in which it's done.
How can a person who you had a great time with, shared some great laughs and intimate moments with decide you're not worthy of even a simple text letting you know they've changed their mind - about you, about dating, about love?
I get it - life changes, circumstances change, people change - but how does one go from 'I want to share with you everything you should know about my family, my life, my job, my plans, my views on society and politics' to 'I am going to pretend you don't exist and we didn't really live any of that'. Sorry, but that sounds bonkers.
Friends will give you the ego-booster "Have you looked in the mirror, mate?", "He doesn't know what he's missing out on", etc. etc. to make you realise you're worth more than that mistreatment. But the fact of the matter is, this isn't about the way you look, your fun personality, your active social life or your great job, it's about the way you treat people and the treatment you get in return.
When you're kind to people and offer them nothing but care, love and respect, it pains a little bit when they make you feel so worthless. It's as if you being a nice person didn't count for anything.
And that's why it hurts.
In my head, I am trying to work out why that hurts. Yes, getting rejected isn't very nice, but I'm grown up enough to realise that I am not going to be everybody's cup of tea, and that's okay.
But at the heart of the hurt is the manner in which it's done.
How can a person who you had a great time with, shared some great laughs and intimate moments with decide you're not worthy of even a simple text letting you know they've changed their mind - about you, about dating, about love?
I get it - life changes, circumstances change, people change - but how does one go from 'I want to share with you everything you should know about my family, my life, my job, my plans, my views on society and politics' to 'I am going to pretend you don't exist and we didn't really live any of that'. Sorry, but that sounds bonkers.
Friends will give you the ego-booster "Have you looked in the mirror, mate?", "He doesn't know what he's missing out on", etc. etc. to make you realise you're worth more than that mistreatment. But the fact of the matter is, this isn't about the way you look, your fun personality, your active social life or your great job, it's about the way you treat people and the treatment you get in return.
When you're kind to people and offer them nothing but care, love and respect, it pains a little bit when they make you feel so worthless. It's as if you being a nice person didn't count for anything.
And that's why it hurts.
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